Admist this struggle, I find myself getting more paranoid.. making things so much worser when the situation is already bad enough.
I've overestimated myself thinking that I'll be able to handle all these perfectly on my own.
The choice of being stupid is already wrong from day 1. Running away from problems is never the solution. Perhaps I'm really stupid to fail to foresee this point.
Enlightments are there. Just that they need to be reinforced, constantly. Till I get used to the personality I used to own.
Words dont matter, actions do.
I'm falling sick.
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